Dreams 2005

Friday January 7, 2005

I had a dream I was at some sea park like Marine World or something, I was by myself. I was wearing my black slippers, white shorts, blue tank top, and wearin my backpack purse, with my hair tied up. I walked by this one huge pool that had seals swimming around in it and people were going into the water to play in the pool with the seals. So, I decided to jump in...and these dead fish kept hitting my arms. I guess it was seal food or something but I was getting grossed out. I took off my slippers and started hitting the dead fish away with them. Then eventually I got out of the pool and realized I lost my slippers... so I decided to go shopping. The sea park turned into a mall...so I was inside Macy's all of a sudden. Looking for slippers but didn't find any. This filipino girl was helping me, well she said they didn't sell anymore flip flops and to go to the Roxy store, that they would still have them. I said ok. Then I started looking at beanies. All of a sudden Jenn was there helping me, I guess she was working there. I must have tried on like 20 different beanies that just didn't look right when I put them on, but when Jenn put them on she just looked good in all of them, haha. Then finally I was jus sitting there and Jenn put a hat on me, fixed my hair a little and told me to look in the mirror. So I look...and I fell in love with it. She did like a total transformation on me...the hat/beanie was adorable and my hair was superstraight and long and I was skinny for some reason. So I look thru the pile for different colors, I remember I was choosing between black, white or tan...or all 3 maybe...



Saturday January 8, 2005

I guess when I take medication before I sleep, especially when I'm sick, mixed with going to bed sad, I end up having nightmares the whole night. I used to have bad dreams about one of my cousins who used to be my best friend back in high school (whom I will refer to as "S") but have lost touch since she began doing some serious drugs. I used to have at least 2 to 3 dreams about her every month, us getting into fist fights and stuff. It's been going on for years, but they stopped the past few months. Until last night, one of the worst dreams I had about her. In the dream, I was at my other cousins house in Santa Clara and it was a get together, we were all just hanging out. My cousin "S" stabbed one of my aunts in the eye with a skinny metal rod. My aunt screamed, I panicked..."S" started walking around for her next target. I ran into the living room, screaming, my dad ran and got my aunt who was bleeding from the eye. We all ran outside and my dad got his car, put my aunt in the back. My other cousin "J" and my brother sat in the backseat, and my dad drove and I was in the passenger seat. My aunt who was in the back, woke up..she transformed into "S" and then stabbed my brother and my other cousin in the back with the same skinny metal rod. "S" climbed over and tried getting my dad and I...that's the last I remember of that scene. Then we were back at the house... then all of a sudden I was shopping at Coscto with my mom and brother. We passed by some marble rice cookers and marble stoves, real fancy... then I feel someone watching us and it's my cousin "S" sitting at some counter smirking at me. I hold my moms hand and just ignore "S" and we walk up to the cashier line to pay for our stuff, we pay, then walk out...then all of a sudden "S" is next to me, talking to me like nothings wrong, my mom was like "hold your cousins hand" (she had no idea what happened)...I just kept a straight face and kept walking... then it switched to another dream where I kept jumping over fences...was with a group of guys and we were working on some project, and I was hiding this blue photo album....someone was after it so I kept jumping over fences to hide it..the guys couldn't catch up with me and jump over fences like I was...but that person found us....She was trying to kill us too....



Wednesday January 26, 2005

Last night's dream, I was on some beach with sandy cliffs and beautiful blue water (in my dreams, water always comes out electric blue) Really fantasy like. It was also a sunny day, lots of people and small shops along the cliffs. I remember walking along the beach and watching people, there was one guy running on the beach with his little black and white dog. All of a sudden I was with someone (with no face) I just remember he was wearing black swim trunks- we were inside one of the shops that were on the cliffs - it was some jewelry store. I was looking out of the window and saw that the ocean was slowly rising and even coming up to the cliffs - from a distance I could see a tsunami coming towards us, towards the store. People were panicking, and scattering around...The guy I was with, grabbed my hand. I told him I needed a life vest because I can't swim, all of a sudden one appeared in his hands and he put it on me but it was way too big...he adjusted it and it ended up being fine...then we started running. I remember looking in some mirror and didn't recognize myself because I was so dark/tan and my hair was long. Anyways, Mr. No-Face saved me, thank you...we made it to somewhere else safe - ended up at some cafe shop, sitting outside on some white lawn/beach chairs talking to these two young guys who also made it away from the tsunami...

Another dream I was on a ship but it was really a restaurant. One level had the drinks, the second level nad food, third level had fruits/desserts. I remember getting lost and confused trying to get my food, it was pretty hard.



Thursday February 17, 2005

5:46am....A dream that felt so real that I just woke up crying... we were hanging out with the guys at my house, which looked different. Then some girl comes over - I think some girl I knew from high school. The girl kept changing appearances but it was supposed to be just one girl. You started talking to her and then all of a sudden you two started dancing to "A Whole New World." You were holding her hands and kept smiling at her and holding her tight. The whole time I just stood there watching speechless. Then, she left the house to go somewhere and was to come back. You and I walked outside my house, walking towards my car which was parked across the street. Jordan and his sister Michelle showed up and we all started walking towards my car, I guess it was Friday night. I looked at you and asked you "Do you have to come back here soon?" and you smiled and said "Yeah, she's coming back." When we all got in my car, since I couldn't talk about it in front of Jordan and Michelle, I texted on my phone "So that's it? You don't love me anymore?" and threw the phone on your lap. You nodded your head, and I was having a hard time driving cause I was in tears. Scenes switched and we were in some store. You answered and said "Yeah... you took too damn long, couldn't even make up your mind," and I said "But I thought we were taking things slow, I thought you were gonna wait for me, I thought I was it for you, I thought you were it for me ...all of a sudden you turn around and fall in love with another girl? Right in front of me?" And you nodded your head and said "Well I was going to tell you but I couldn't, it just happened..." You started walking away, Iscreamed "Fuck you!" and grabbed a mirror that was on the counter and tried throwing it at you but missed. And then you were gone...I woke up in tears with the deepest heartache ever and it took me 5 minutes to realize that it was just a dream.



Sunday February 27, 2005

Dream 1: I don't know where I was, in some restauraunt or mall with E. E and I were running away from some people who were chasing us... All I remember is we just kept running and running. Dodging people, jumping over things - we ended up outside in some neighborhood and were jumping/flying over fences, jumping off people's roofs and sheds, from one backyard to another. It felt good...I stopped by home for some reason, and things changed - the scene changed. I was just getting dressed to go somewhere, but then I ended up in an ugly ass tuxedo that was black but had rainbow stripes on some parts of it. Then I remember deciding to run away, my mom was giving me hell for it... all of a sudden I started running again, this time by myself... I was scared but felt free at the same time, just kept running, never out of breath. Then I was in a restaurant with two other guys, and they started running into the restaurant chasing someone, I started running with them too, jumping over tables in the dining area, jumping over things in the kitchen. Then we ended up outside...one of the guys said "oh that guy tried sneaking in."

Dream 2: I was in some park in a grassy area with E, he was wearing his blue hat, blue sweater and jeans. We were kickboxing but playfully, just using our legs to try to kick each other in the asses. We were almost flying on our feet, I'd try to show off to show him how fast I could move my feet and dodge him. He never kicked me once but I got him quite a few times in the ass, and I just remember us laughing like crazy having so much fun.

Dream 3: I was at home and had to go somewhere in downtown San Jose to get some things for my mom. I left with my brother... I was on a bicycle but my feet couldn't touch the ground. I remember screaming at my brother to help me keep the bike up, we were on Abbott Street, where all the cars were at a light. My brother was like 8 feet tall in this dream, and my bike was probably 6 feet tall because my feet were like 3 feet off the ground and the bike kept falling when I was at a stop because I couldn't balance it. Tried grabbing my brother's arm, I'd fall and the bike would lean but I never really hit the ground. I kept telling him I had to go to First Street.

Dream 4: I was sleeping and when I woke up, I was on a twin sized bed in the office at one of my old jobs, amc. The blankets/sheets were red/gray...I remember Annie, Devin, Buffie and Brian. Annie told me she couldn't believe I slept on that bed because she hadn't washed it for months and it was nasty...so I agreed to wash the sheets. Took them all off the bed, then left to go get oranges with Brian until I realized I forgot the sheets.


Thursday April 28, 2005

Dream: I was at some beautiful beach; turquoise water and clean peach sand... I was sad for some reason, so sad that I decided to run into the water to drown myself. So I started running trying to reach the water, accidentally stepping on people who were laying on the beach, and half of these people were wrapped in their towels like mummies from head to toe...all of a sudden these huge rocks and tidepools came out of nowhere, and I couldn't run anymore. I couldn't get to the water...so I stood there disappointed and crying my heart out...



Thursday September 22, 2005

Wow, it's been months since I logged any dreams down. I guess it's because I started having a lot of bad dreams that I didn't want to remember and I just didn't want to write them down. Then I got lazy. I still dream...a lot... but I don't make an effort to remember them. Maybe I kind of stopped caring. I've lost control of my dreams, I can't do what I want to do or fly anymore...not lately... All I've been dreaming about are things I've feared and am currently fearing. Shows how much junk goes through my mind before I sleep, right? I'm trying to remember the last dream I had...but it's not coming to me. I guess it would be last week, I had a dream I was on some raft, going around some business building that had water around it. In it were a bunch of koi fish, all sizes. As I passed them by they would come up and stick their mouths out of the water to be fed. There was one particular koi - orange, silver, white and black. Probably about 3 feet long...the patterns on it made it look like a tiger. Had distinct black stripes on its body, and it also had those catfish whiskers. He came up out of the water and sat on the rocks and I was walking around it looking at it while it was cleaning itself...

Fish: To see fish swimming freely in clear water is an omen of wealth and personal power.



Tuesday September 27, 2005

A few nights ago...I had a dream...

That I was at some party/get-together. There was this HUGE ass pig walking around, I'd say about the size of a love seat sofa. It seemed normal, except that it had no meat on it's hind legs - it was nothing but bones for legs. No skin, no meat, just white bone and hooves. It was standing next to this fire pit, where the people at the party were ripping off meat from the pigs hind legs and cooking it in the fire. The pig wasn't in pain, just standing there letting these people rip off meat and cook it and eat it. What was more disturbing, was that the people were also cooking the meat, and then FEEDING it to the pig, and the pig ate it happily, not knowing that it was eating its own self. I was watching in disgust and the pig made eye contact with me...then it started chasing me so I started running...I ended up in some house, hiding inside these white cabinets...

I must be disturbed...

Pig: Another example of the good news/bad news, contrast-in-meaning type of dream omen. It signifies vexation in family affairs, but satisfaction in business or professional matters. The omen is modified by the condition of the animals: intensified if the pigs were fat; and diminished if they were lean.



Tuesday September 27, 2005

Last night I had a dream that I was going on a cruise to Hawaii and back in the same day, with my cousins Laurie and Edwin. We went the first time, and I remember looking at the sky which was purple pink and blue... Edwin had these "light bombs" that he was throwing off the ship into the ocean...they would light up the water bright for a minute or two, making the water a glowing bright clear turquoise color, and we could see all the jellyfish swimming in the water. Then, the next day we wanted to go back to Hawaii on another cruise, but Edwin and I had a problem getting our passports?



Wednesday September 28, 2005

I was in high school again, I think it was the first day of school...but it was a different high school from the one I went to. The weather was sunny and warm, real dream like haze... I was walking to different classes, running into old high school folks...I was really happy, it was a good feeling. But I kept forgetting what class was next...so I was just wandering around asking classmates if they knew where my next class was. And I had a locker, it was #14... but I forgot the combination of that as well, I remember playing with the lock, spinning it around and around. I also left my (pink jansport?) backpack in one of my classes so I was going around trying to find the classroom but I couldn't because the campus kept changing...



Thursday September 29, 2005

I was in Hawaii again, this time on a beach with Elmo, Mike and some other guy, I don't remember who. We were on some bright beach, white sand, with clear turquoise water. I was actually skinny and had on a white bikini. I was sitting on the sand and letting the waves hit my feet and legs, and I was screaming to Mike, "I can't believe how fucking clear the water is! I can't believe how nice it is!! I never want to go home!!" And Mike said "Yup" and nodded his head, he was chillin in the water. Elmo was walking around the sand. The other guy was deeper in the water, wading. I was soooo excited...I got up and started walking on the water! I was concentrating really hard...it was a weird feeling...



Friday September 30, 2005

I was hanging out with some people - some I knew, and some I didn't... All of a sudden I was in someone's house, and this guy (don't remember who), wanted to show me some albums...so we went into this small room that had two twin sized beds in it. Posters on walls, clothes and junk all over floor....near the door there was this one chest that had all these vinyls - but the covers were like 3 ft by 3 ft big. He put one record in, and it played "Let's Stay Together" by Al Green - but the guy showed me the dusty cover - and it had 5 filipino guys on it, all with afros and plaid bell bottom pants. The group was called "The Filipinos." Haha....He said, "These guys are the original singers." I said, "No way." I walked out of the room and to the right was the front door, and there were a few people drunk and passed out on the grass/lawn: Charles, Chit, Moses, Lena....

I wonder...how we dream of these places you've never ever been before, seen houses and streets you've never seen before...do they really exist out there somewhere? I think so...I feel like my dream world is my real life, and this life here is a dream I'm trapped in...



Tuesday October 4, 2005

I dreamt that either two people, or two big animals (cows?) were buried underground...and about a few yards away, huge amounts of blood started rising out of the grass/ground/cement and leaking down...

Blood: Be prepared for a period of hard work against hostile forces if you saw blood in your dream. If you were bleeding, try to avoid any sort of controversy with friends or relatives; however, if the blood was that involved in a transfusion, you can expect your difficulties to be very transitory.



Thursday October 13, 2005

I was at a Wal-Mart or something...had a cart, looking at a whole bunch of makeup, specifically nail polish. Llemo was there but he got mad at me for some reason and went outside. I decided to finish shopping and when I was done, I went outside with my cart and looked everywhere for Llemo, but he was gone and so was his car. Left me by myself.... Punk ass.



Thursday October 27, 2005

I was someplace where there were buildings I've never seen before...I was inside and then everyone started running out because supposedly there was a bomb about to go off? There were broken windows all around the building so I just jumped out of a window....started running...and I heard the blast and I fell on the grass and looked back and saw orange flames and black smoke push out of the building. I keep running, and end up near a frozen lake. Some people were running and ended up falling in but were able to get out...I remember I was laying on the ice stomach down, and this old man in front of me fell in the ice but got out. He was shaking his leg and arm, saying how cold the water was...I saw a big silver ring on the guys finger. I decide to "glide" on the ice, which worked. It's like I was barely putting any of my body weight onto the ice and I made it safely across the lake faster than anyone else. Then I was in some weird pet shop with Elmo. I remember seeing miniature mice. And in one cage, there was hay and two tiny baby platypuss's (sp?) sitting in there...so freaking adorable. Their beaks were actually velvety...cutest things in the world! I told Elmo I wanted one...



Monday December 19, 2005

I had a dream last night that I was getting ready for school...going back to college! I was at home, flat ironing my hair...only half of it was done and the other half was tied up on top. I was late for school so I went to my first class, holding my flat iron in my hand, looking for a desk that had an outlet so I could finish flat ironing my hair. Then I realized, I had none of my school stuff - no pencil/pens, no notebooks or anything. I sat at a table with some people I went to high school with. I asked if I could borrow a pencil and paper and they gave me one paper and a pencil. Class ended, and I didn't know what my second class was, because I forgot my binder and schedule at home. So, I called my brother and woke him up so he could go into my room, find my schedule, and tell me what my schedule was....only we ended up talking about something else and he fell asleep on the phone. Then I was in another class, it was a spanish cooking class - there were two teachers, two mexican ladies teaching the class. I was still trying to find a place to finish flat ironing my hair....



Wednesday December 21, 2005

Last night I dreamt that I was stuffing myself with cookies and bread. And everything was soooo good.



Wednesday December 28, 2005

Not last night but the other night, I dreamt I was at some school or building that was falling apart because of a tsunami. Walls were gone, everything was wrecked. I had 3 storage boxes that I was trying to get out of my classroom... but they were too heavy and no one would help me. I was walking down some hallway to go to this one room. I passed an open office and some creepy guy was sitting there, and saw me walk by and said hi, giving me this creepy stare. I just kept walking and went into the room. There was a whole bunch of old stuff in there, old record players, old albums, old everything. I closed the door behind me and started looking for something, until I heard the door close again. I looked at the door, no one there. I turned back around and there was that creepy guy right next to me...I think he was going to kill me or something. But I grabbed a walkie talkie, and called for police, while trying to fight him off. Then, I saw police through the window - looked more like a SWAT guy. Dressed in black, helmet, some big ass gun... I don't remember what happened after that.

Then I had another dream that I was back in school... I have no idea where it was but it was a huge campus. The sun was shining. Someone was following me in my dream but I kept avoiding, cursing. Then after school, I remember walking down the steps and I started to walk home. The neighborhood was weird too, lots of tall colorful 2-3 story buildings. I kept walking but I never got home...



Friday December 30, 2005

I was sticking blue thumbtacks into my left palm. I outlined with the thumbtacks four squares, and then in one of the squares (upper right corner) I completely covered with thumbtacks. They were pushed in my hand all the way. (I never feel physical pain in my dream or realize it - emotional pain is the worst though). Well, I decided to pick all the thumbtacks out of my hand and the skin started peeling away in my hand, and blood was oozing out. It was brownish blood though, and thick like watery salsa. I just washed my hand in a sink (then my blood turned red) and then I dried it and put a big bandaid on my palm.

Then I go to Sierra Center in Milpitas to try to find Blockbuster so I can return my dvds. I was walking around the parking lot with a cart and my 4 dvd's in the front. I ended up walking into some amusement park? The lady stopped me and asked me for my ticket...but I didn't have one. I told her I was trying to find Blockbuster. Then all of a sudden my dad and my uncle (Jenny's dad) came up to me...they were each pushing a baby stroller but I didn't get to see who the babies were. The lady at the park told me she'd let me go...but if I got caught in the park with no ticket, to not tell them about her. So I'm walking and pushing my cart while my dad and uncle follow me, pushing a stroller. We go to this one big tank that had a bunch of seaweed in it, so I figured there were fish in it. Only there were like 20 7-inch naked Dora dolls swimming around in the water. Freaky.

I had another dream I was at some house... there was a blue haze in there. I remember my cousin "Jane" was in there but I don't think we were fighting this time. I remember standing in front of a mirror trying to flat iron my hair. But I didn't see myself in the mirror. I also remember ceramic plates with yellow lemons painted on them. Maybe it was a slumber party thing at someones house, I remember watching TV and people laying on the ground in their sleeping bags.

PIN: Pricking yourself or being pricked by a pin (unless you sat on it) signifies that you will have to help someone else cope with some problems.

BLOOD: Be prepared for a period of hard work against hostile forces if you saw blood in your dream. If you were bleeding, try to avoid any sort of controversy with friends or relatives.

DOLLS: It is generally agreed that dolls, being a symbol of childhood, predict social and/or domestic happiness.

HAIR: Curling or setting your hair pertains to emotional affairs and promises either an improvement in your marital relations or a new romance.



Saturday December 31, 2005

I was at some place that looked like Vegas but it was on shore, right next to a beach. I was in some cabin and looking out, I saw the Mirage, Bellagio, Harrah's and so on...and then there was the ocean... My other cousins had decided to go to "the snow"... so they went first and I followed a few minutes after. Then I was by myself in some cave looking thing, and met my cousin Woo there. We walked into another smaller room/cave and ran into some dog that had a head of a full grown boxer but body of a small beagle or something...It was cute for some reason though. Then Woo and I went up this red elevator that was at the cave. We went up and all of a sudden I was with * and a whole bunch of other people but Woo was gone. There were clear elevators everywhere with red steel posts, filled with people. We were going up, and then the elevator got stuck. I looked out at Vegas on the Beach... and then looked to the other side where people were sliding on gigantic slides. One kid flew up so high that he ended up landing on the slide next to him and going down a different tunnel. Then I looked around more, and saw the ocean and it was gorgeous. The sky had turned purple... the water was clear - seemed like there were lights illuminating the bottom of the ocean because it was glowing a bright flourescent turquoise color, and I could see some corals and the white sand. There were 3 big cruise ships in the distance just floating and their lights glowing... We were still stuck in the elevator. Then I started crying. I turned to * and told him that he could never plan things for me because that's just not him...